Posts Tagged With: prayer

Yeshua in Psalm 13

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Categories: Interlinear, On Faith | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Questions

If relationship is what you desire,
Then why do you hide,
Where did you go?

If you’re word is your bond,
Then why do you tarry,
Or make a promise?

If you know my heart,
Then why do you hurt me,
and ignore my dreams?

Why is it always with you,
Love is black and blue?

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Answered Prayers

praying-and-kneeling-man

“Jesus never mentioned unanswered prayer. He had the unlimited certainty of knowing that prayer is always answered.” ~Oswald Chambers

The first thing that I would have to admit is this: be careful what you pray for because it will be answered.

There’s been so much that Caity and I have been praying for over this last year, that when we sit down and talk about what has gone on we see the heavy gravity of God’s faithfulness to answer our prayers.

This last Spring we realized how stuck we were in so many ways and we cried out in prayer for God to initiate the changes that we could not do for ourselves.  That was the beginning of a swift journey of upheaval for us beginning with our hearts, then our marriage and finally our jobs.

God started with both of our hearts, removing the layers of scar tissue blocking us from Him and each other.  It was immediate, it was critical and it was painful.  Yet by the end of the divine surgery, Caity and I discovered that even our old hearts were gone and replaced by new, fresh hearts each with its own deepened capacity to love and desire for vulnerability in our marriage.  Humbling and incredible.  We have spent more time over the last six months laughing, crying, sharing, loving and praying together than we ever did in the last ten years.

Then at the end of July, our children began asking for more “family days”.  We had been a seven-day work week family for the last seven years; it was the only reasonable way to make ends meet.  One of us was always working and the other was always at home with the kids, but we never had days off together.  This had created quite a strain on us all and the kids were beginning to get sad with the system.  There were no sabbath rests for us.

So Caity and I talked about our work situation and realized that it too needed to change but we didn’t know how.  Yet we did see the benefit of family days, of regular sabbath rests.  So we decided to get the kids into it also and asked them to pray with us, to pray and ask Jesus to change Mommy’s and Daddy’s job situations to provide for days off together.

Again, be careful what you pray for because it will be answered.

We found out at the very beginning of August that Caity’s store would be closing.  We realized immediately that God was at work answering our prayers, but not in the way that we would have wanted or expected.  She worked until September 11, 2013 with Haggen until they closed the Shoreline store.  Then she was done, and all of a sudden we had weekends off as a family.

It was shocking and we could have responded by falling into anxiety over our decreased income, but instead we did something different: we celebrated!  We celebrated by going out to dinner.  We celebrated by praying over a portion of our savings we wanted to give away and the Holy Spirit led us to two families in desperate need.  We celebrated by getting up early and spending time together reading the bible and in prayer.  We celebrated by intentionally spending time with our children and doing things that brought them joy.  We celebrated by turning off the television and tuning into our marriage.  We celebrated for the cause of liberation in our lives.

And finally we have had one more prayer answered in regards to the job changes—I will be promoted beginning next week to take over my own property and become the property manager for the Woodland North Apartments in Lake Forest Park.  Monday, November 11th will be my first day, exactly two months from the date of Caity’s last day of work.  Trust me when I say that this was all God’s doing—I didn’t seek it out at all.

Initially, the way God chose to answer our prayers looked backward.  Truth be told, we all want so badly to have our circumstances changed, thinking that a change like that alone will be enough to change our hearts.  Yet God knows better.  He desires heart change first before any change of circumstance.  To surrender to Jesus in gratitude before anything else.  And when all was finished, Caity and I recognized that we were the ones who had been moving backward; God was the one now taking us forward.  Our perspectives were all wrong and we learned to surrender to His direction for our lives.

Again, be careful what you pray for because it will be answered.

SOLI DEO GLORIA!

Categories: On Faith, On Life | Tags: , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Beyond My Pen

My hands do long to bless the lost with hope,
My pen does long to soar long the pages,
I stand, I run and stumble down the slope,
Will my work be unreached through the ages?
Are my efforts feasting last on Maundy?
My work be shattered on the Corner Stone,
Eli, Eli lama sabacthani?
Oh Father, raise my light that once had shone.
God of mercy, bless this shadowed spirit;
My God of grace, descend and make me whole.
I am humbled, grant to me Your merit;
Creative work does much to joy my soul.

My spirit is broken beyond my pen,
Oh Lord, when will this purgatory end?

***

Originally written sometime in March 2009 as a prayer sonnet.  I was obviously struggling with feelings of inadequacy regarding my writing and any lack of progress thereof.  Funny enough, this prayer has indeed been answered line for line (although not in any way I would have wanted or imagined at the time).

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Fall Supplication

Open and full, the Fall lies before me,
Hot, spent and tired, the Summer behind;
Gold to fire the leaves will turn, tree to tree,
And drop with the rain, descending design.
Sweet Autumn lift me up as you fall down,
May your tears rinse away my refining;
Each leaf cast is a jewel in your crown,
The blanketing clouds are your defining.
Deciduous destinies shedding all,
Relieving themselves of their canopies,
Until they are fully bare, standing tall,
Arrayed in magnificent panoplies.

Oh looming supplicants with arms stretched wide,
Let me join you in your prayers, at your side.

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Open the Floodgates

It’s been an interesting week, to say the least.  Caity and I have been praying for changes for at least a year now in regards to certain circumstances that have been out of our control.  And as it turns out, work is one of them.  For the last seven years we have been a seven-day work week family and it has not been ideal but completely necessary.  Caity and I have been able to equally split the tasks of childcare and bringing home the bacon; there are several reasons why we did this, but the most important one was that we both needed to be elbows deep in raising our kids–because we have twins–because our son has autism–and because all three of our kids together are roughly the same size and fully ramped in energy and zest for life.  The obvious setbacks with the scenario however, are that our income has been impossibly tight and we have not had any semblance of rest in regards to weekends together for the better part of a decade.

Yet, we’ve been praying for change; praying for God to open the floodgates of heaven.  And indeed that is exactly what’s happening right now, but the news could not have come in a more uncertain or terrifying fashion.  Yesterday when Caity went to work, she was called into a store meeting where she discovered that the company will be closing the grocery store she’s worked at the for the last 8 years.  Everyone’s job is in flux and emotions are running high, but I would have to say that I’m so proud of her.  Caity kept her chin up the whole day and went about her work all the while pouring out encouragement and strength on her coworkers and customers.  We both acknowledged that this event, though it appears to be a crisis, will turn out to be filled with opportunity; we are willing to stand firm together on the solid bedrock of Jesus in our lives and let him guide our destiny.  Things may not appear clear right now but that is why it becomes so important to place our hope in the One that cannot fail.

The other thing that goes with this story so well is the fact that Caitlin and I both love the rain and eschew hot sunshine with the full fibers of our beings.  At least for the last month, it’s felt full of sun and heat…and driving us to scramble for shade where ever it can be found.  So yesterday after she finished her shift, the kids and I had prepared a fun scavenger hunt for her to follow, ending up with meeting me and kids at Target, where we would then go to a restaurant of her choice for a family dinner date.  The kids and I were browsing the toy aisle when I heard it…thunder!  Several claps grew louder and shook the store.  My kids were crying but all I could think of was: God is displaying his power–He is in charge!  After calming the kids we went to the front of the store, where Caity showed up just in time and the rains began to pour out.  Rain!  Opening the floodgates of heaven!  We both held each other and cried, surrounded by our crying children, in the middle of Target.  What a scene we made!  It could have been from a movie.

Was it a coincidence?  There’s no such thing.  Just a final nerdy note from yours truly:

The Hebrew language is different from every other language on earth in that it is the only language where the characters represent  not only numbers (gematria) as well as letters (alphabet), but that the language itself–it’s structure, it’s syntax, and even the words themselves impart a deeper spiritual significance.  There are many examples of this, but the one that is fitting for this post is what is NOT in the Hebrew language.  For instance, there is no word in Hebrew that can accurately convey the idea of “coincidence” simply because the idea is not grounded in reality.  Accepting the idea that things happening can only be “coincidence” actually robs a person of being able to acknowledge the hand of God in their life.

In fact the closest modern Hebrew equivalent to the concept of “coincidence” would be: יד המקרה

These two words placed together are pronounced “Yad Hamiqrah”, where “Yad” is the word for “hand” and “Hamiqrah” means “the event” , “the incident” , or even “fate.”  Essentially “Yad Hamiqrah” acknowledges that when certain events unfold in an impossibly coincidental way, then there is no mistake–a greater guiding hand is at work.

The fact that God personally spoke to Caity and I through the thunder and rain yesterday was certainly His guiding hand at work.  I know it and I have placed it within the treasure chamber of my heart to ponder, later.  Yet I am learning how to trust in God; to place the destiny of my family into His unfailing hands.

SED EGO DIGREDIENDUM

Categories: On Faith | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

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